u/22ndsol

Heard! I will definitely reach out to her.

...how does copyright apply if I don't plan on showing/selling it? Sincerely curious, not being pedantic

4 years pre marriage, 6 years post marriage

maybe "been together" 10 years would have been better? we dated for 4 years, then got married and had our 6th wedding anniversary a few months ago.

thank you!

We both grew up in Scouts, and met while both teaching at a Scout Camp when we were 15! Didn't start dating until a few years later. I have actually taught that basket weaving merit badge 🤣

Thanks for the big brothers suggestion, 1 on 1 interactuon is especially important when we don't have any nephews/nieces to look after.

I'm horrified that you are the only person who has commented that it worked out.

Jesus fucking Christ I'm no longer interacting with messages about my therapy. God forbid my husband know I struggle to process my emotions at times and suggest an unbiased and trusted party to assist with that.

I...am horrified at how many people agree with you. I'm going to hope everyone is wrong but keep it in mind.

Haven't found a doctor yet that will consider sterilizing someone under 30.

why is everyone so weirded out that I would call my therapist about the possibility of a big change in my life????? helping me figure shit out is LITERALLY their whole job

breaking news! it's fucking weird for an anxious person to ask for help processing emotions!! guess all therapists are out of business now!

edit: not directed at you, sorry. lots of people were very disturbed by that comment ig

do you have any you suggest? he'd love to do scouting stuff, but people think it's weird he wants to be a scout leader without having kids.

(married 6, dating 10)

insurance issues, yep. we've both asked a few times and were told we're too young for that decision. (late 20s)

1) what do you mean by pathologize? /gen if it's about the therapy thing, he has no interaction with my therapist (who is NOT a marriage counselor) and was suggesting them as an outside person to talk the whole thing over with. my therapist is also childfree.

2) I mean. "plans" is like "well we don't have another bedroom and I wouldnt want you to give up your craft room, so we'd have to have a bigger house. maybe like 3-5 years from now?" and "we'd have a support network of both of our families." that's it that's the extent of the plans. did I oversell plans? idfk I was genuinely not expecting this much "dump him and run" over a single conversation

I don't think either of us would have been smart enough to plan a longcon marriage to have kids when we started dating at 17 -_-

how has it gone since?

we're both neurodivergent and both moved out at 18 (the usual age here) but yeah, it's definitely not a sure thing. I'll talk to him about volunteering with kids; neither of our siblings have kids (one too young, one not married) so we're not around them often

STBX? the only thing I can think is Starbucks, but that's obviously not right.

I wouldn't consider him thinking about it a betrayal??? I'm not the thought police even if I disagree with it. he is allowed to have desires for his own life and they are allowed to change.

late 20s

it definitely was not presented as a snap decision - it was more "hey, I've been thinking about this, I want to talk about it now to keep everything out in the open since I know it's different than we've discussed. earliest I would be comfortable with this would be in 3-5 years if it's something you want"

his coworkers have kids and keep talking about them. he wants to pass on his knowledge and help them learn how the world works and teach them and do fatherly things with them. it's cute, but...

this was him acknowledging I was anxious about the entire conversation and encouraging me to talk to my trusted therapist about it, as it was a big change.

can you link it? I trust my therapist GREATLY (they're also childfree) but I want to see what the argument is so I'm ready to refute if needed

post edited, I phrased it poorly; the intention was to make that option sound insane, because it is

okay I'm straight back to laughing now. my therapy has nothing to do with my marriage or relationship and never has. I sought them out on my own for unrelated reasons, they have never spoken with my husband, and they are ALSO childfree. if you're going to make this many assumptions about the mere mention of someone going to therapy I won't be engaging in with you further.

what the fuck????? I'm sorry my husband supports me in therapy?????

I will not be having a child to keep a man, I meant to present that as an unreasonable option

Jesus Christ, he knows I see a therapist weekly and suggested I bring it up to them at my next session so we could talk about it. How does that come across as rude