u/Boochiecoo

I’m your evil twin, an unrepentant fragrance chaos monster. To each our own… you probably smell wonderful!

Hate powdery so much that I am going to give up on trying to like Serge Lutens Chergui which I blind bought. It’s like this perfect, poetic, kind of dry amber. Like a sunlit outdoor spice market…. Where someone is powdering a baby’s ass for no reason OMG. It kind of makes me feel insane

I really love Tide, there’s something mellow about it. Sometimes I think I smell a fig accord, but it’s nowhere in the notes. Also sometimes musk smells really chemically and metallic to me and this one doesn’t.

Love a g neutral fragrance!! My fragrance preferences are like, 70% gender neutral 10% masc 20% high femme vintage or white floral sex bombs 😂😂😂 in my life I present as a fairly feminine middle aged cis woman, in my perfume life, well, it’s very genderqueer and very drama

Another perfume nerd and Tosha’s crossever person here!

Current faves:

Robert Piguet, Bandit (sharp leather and very green, vintagey, “bitch chic”)

Serge Lutens, l’Orpheline (soft incense, mysterious, glamorous)

ERIS, Green Spell (magical sparkly verdant ethereal)

Santa Maria Novella, Tobacco Toscano (cozy pipe tobacco with vanilla)

Guerlain, Angelique Noire (if vanilla sprouted dragonfly wings and took flight off green spring shoots)

Meo Fusciuni, Varanasi (like a woody men’s cologne if it attained consciousness and had a lot of poignant wispy memories)

When in the mood for something less intense:

Maya Njie, Nordic Cedar (easy but not boring Cedar and cardamom)

Maison Louis Marie, Nouvelle Vague (fig)

I’m a total perfume freak and Fracas is still in my top 5 of all time and will certainly always be

R/decantswap

I can hear Hank Hill saying “They got frogs kissing pigs, what the hell did you think was gonna happen?”

Oh! I got a mod team message here…. My apologies if it was weird to say you could DM me!!!! This rule makes total sense and I just never thought about it

I wish there was a great book about autism and meditation. Left a long comment here already. If you do want to continue to try meditation and want more advice you can DM me, I have about 20 years of meditation experience (and have zero religious agenda here)

I’m reading the Terry Pratchett books and there are so many things Rowling blatantly stole from them, it’s kind of shocking

What you’re saying matches up with what I’ve read, but, regarding microdosing, my understanding is that it’s harder to study, so there’s way less hard data. So it’s not that it doesn’t work as well necessarily, but that it’s less studied. We know via studies that large doses work. We don’t know via studies whether microdosing works or doesn’t. Or how the effects of microdosing compare to those seen in the large dose protocols.

It’s interesting to consider the value of “anecdotal evidence” in this context. There are heaps of firsthand accounts about its effectiveness, it seems it should count for something, for someone who is looking into trying it. Yet also a lot of people will evangelize about the latest bullshit diet trend macronutrient.

I’ve microdoses and found it very very helpful, for my 2 cents. Also it being less of a big scary experience made it more approachable and less daunting. So even if the efficacy were less, I was more likely to take the “treatment” at all, and that’s another factor worth thinking about.

The mods removed this post as “low effort”
Which is only making me laugh even harder you guys 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Also this thread might interest you if you haven’t seen it before https://www.reddit.com/r/FemFragLab/s/o1cQceeOKc

🌸🍃🍂🍋☘️🌷🪾🌿🌻🌱🌺🍃🍒🥀🌹🌾🍊🌼🪷🪻🍁

My guess is that it’s the intensity of the wife’s responses. Some people experience flooding, overwhelm and meltdown from stress, with ASD. Also it might be the unwelcome, threatening aspect of of change - her certainty of being married (or happily married) is in question, and uncertainty and change can be extra hard with ASD.

That said she needs to be able to be a full person with her wife and not get subsumed by the wife’s overwhelming feelings and needs. She may need support for her own hard feelings after such a painful betrayal, that it might be hard for the wife to give.

I’ve been through some similar stuff and this really went to my heart. Huge hugs to you from this random, gen x mom (no matter what your age).

For advice, the suggestions already made:

-spend some time apart to cool off, so you can get your own bearings and sort out your feelings, not always be in each other’s space. Treat this as an emergency not a choice
- Get counselling ASAP. Couples, yes, but especially for yourself. Are you making yourself - your feelings and your needs - smaller because her experiences are so intense and big? You need support. Again, not a choice it’s a need.

More hugs!!!!!!!!!

🤠✨

No I was driving back from Portland that day, unfortunately! If you’re interested, DM and I will tell you the local secrets of Rotary Auction!

By “believe in it” I mean whether I believe that there are, literally, malevolent forces or entities which need to be dismissed. I’m sort of agnostic about that, and find the actual practice of dismissal useful.

There’s a lot of fear-mongering out there, and it’s up to you to discover your own path. Do YOU believe in entities or energetic boundaries or whatever? What works for you?

Personally I ask the client to invite in their guides, and ask anything that isn’t here for their benefit to get lost during the session. I don’t know if I believe in it really but it creates a powerfully psychologically positive and safe environment for them to get a good reading within…As you probably know, most readers who work with guides work directly with the person’s guides, I ask the person to invite their own guides and listen to them as we go through the reading, and we thank them at the end of the session. This feels like plenty of protection and I’ve never had a problem with contagious energy/entities or “psychic herpes” ha ha. Also sharing my approach to show how each of us develops our own highly quirky yet effective styles over time, to encourage you to find your own.

Don’t mind the fearmongers and people pushing their own way as the right way.

Have you considered developing fragrance for hand fans?

I’ve been spraying perfumes on my hand fans. Which I predict are going to become more popular again because of rising heat levels. My favorites for this so far have been ELDO You or Someone Like You - a sample, which I don’t enjoy on my skin but was lovely and refreshing on a hand fan, and Santa Maria Novella Rose, which was giving some extremely fun vintage boudoir vibes when wanted off a black hand fan. However the fans can’t be washed so they have to be designated by perfume. Or at least by perfume family. Like, the one fan is now my freshie fan and the other is a rose fan, permanently. Luckily fans are inexpensive so it’s not really a problem.

I could imagine developing scent fur this purpose or even bringing pre-scented hand fans to market. Not sure how you perfumers work the magic of scent longevity, but my fans are hanging on to scent beautifully after several weeks after application…

Please, OP, listen to us older ladies who have been around the block a few times.

This man does not have character. Don’t align your life with his. And your character… a lot of people have said harsh things to you in this thread about that. But, I would advise asking*yourself* if this is the woman *you* want to be.

Chemistry cools down after 2 years, 3 max. Love always feels intense and special. I am so sorry to tell you that it really isn’t. It really isn’t. Really. There are many many other men out there for you. And as he has shown in his past behavior there are many other women for him also. Sure, maybe you’re special for him. The One for him where the love, this time, not like all the other times, is the real thing. Or maybe you’re just inexperienced enough to believe that. To believe that a man who threw away his family life for an affair will stick to you, because you’re special, that he will change his cheating ways, for you, that if he built a family with you he wouldn’t eventually get bored or be enticed away from you by another woman, etc. Sweetie. Does this sound likely? Honestly?

It seems like nobody bothers to say this to young people these days : this is how sex works. It induces very strong feelings of attachment. Sure, a few people can have sex without catching feelings but, if there’s also an emotional connection you’re screwed. Well… literally. I wish more young people would take this seriously and not let themselves get in too deep with unsuitable partners and find out too late that they are deeply bonded to, and in love with, someone who isn’t right for them ultimately. It sounds ridiculously old fashioned but honestly, young folks could save so much heartbreak if they could pump the brakes on the sexuality until the potential partner has been thoroughly checked out for character and aligned values, etc.

I hope you can shake yourself out of the intoxicating feelings you’re having and take a hard look at your life choices. Even if, as many commenters here have said, you’re focused only on yourself and have a lack of caring for others involved, I think there are very serious questions about your own future and your character that demand engaging with.

This.

Wow I can hardly believe how many people are blaming the girlfriend or implying it’s all her fault.

If a guy wasn’t usually having an orgasm, nobody would blame him for not wanting to have sex because it’s frustrating and makes him feel resentful.

I think her advocacy for herself is a sign of self respect and not wanting to get into a relationship pattern where she decides her own pleasure isn’t important which let’s face it, so many women do. A lot of women settle for sex that doesn’t satisfy them because they think it’s normal or they don’t want to hurt the guy’s feelings or they feel guilty about their own sexual desire.

That said, this couple needs to work on their communication skills. She does need to be sensitive about how she communicates about this, both partners need to be caring and kind.

Right? Why did I have to scroll down much before someone said “edging”