u/FaeFromFairyland

Yeah, unfortunetely I see I'm not the only one. I've bought from them two times. First time, I ordered a dress in my size and it came after some time, fit perfectly and I have to say - the clothes look like they should, no scam there, BUT the second time I ordered a dress and didn't like it and it was obviously made for someone way taller, but since it cost a lot, I returned it. They provided the label and all, but... I never got my money back, I wrote to them, they asked for proof I sent it, I gave it to them, since then - nothing.

But that's not all. After several months the dress came back because, as it was stated on the package, they did not receive it, they REFUSED the package. So now I have the dress at home, didn't get my money back AND I have paid for sending it to China and the way BACK too. It's now the most expensive dress I own.

You can have goals without meaning. I think there is no meaning and whatever I do won't matter in the end anyway. I think there is no God, no fate, just nature with it's absurd evolution that is going forward, but to no certain destination. It's a perpetuum mobile that will continue just because it can. Most of what happens is by chance. So what meaning can you find in a world like that?

But at the same time, we live, we have time and energy and just wasting it sitting doing nothing is no better than doing something - is it? If you make something, at least you create something, it's movement. It's better to move than to stay frozen at place. It's more useful, if nothing. You have a life, you have needs, you have wants - that's what life is about. Not about any special, high meaning, but about being human, surviving and looking for enjoyment or feeling that you've done something or helped someone and you're proud. Not because it changes anything, but because you like to do it, you want to do it, and THAT IS ENOUGH REASON.

Why must we always chase some meaning? Why waste our time and life and rob ourselves of enjoyment thinking "what's the point" and "there should be more, I should do more, I should make a change...". I think that search for meaning and the weight of "if it's not meaningful, it's worthless" robs us of joy, of motivation, of life. That instead of trying to find a meaning or create it we should just do whatever we want to do (and doesn't hurt anyone) and use what we have in the best way we can. Whether it means anything or not.

Overall, I think I'm an absurdist, if that helps.

Not exactly because of a trope, but I am writing a book (two, actually, but mostly focus on one now), so... yeah... BUT what I really think should be written more often is a villain romance. And I mean true villain. Evil people. Both of them. Just two bad apples doing crazy shit together and being so right for each other. No sweet girl, no "I'm a badass fighter but also killing my opponent is just so wrooong", no redemption arc for him, just bad :D Everyone today is about healthy relationships and I love that in real life but in fiction, I kinda want toxic sometimes, not with one being the victim, both. More fun.

She sounds very much autistic, and discarding that based just on one look is very unprofessional of the person.

As autistic "high functioning" person myself, I would suggest trying to find together what kind of fabrics and types of clothes are bearable for her. Once you know and make sure her wardrobe is made of them, it's gonna be a lesser issue. There may be worse days, but overall, she can't change how it feels and stop having meltdowns, she can't get used to it, she needs clothes she can stand.

As of the uniform, that's a fight I don't know if you can win, because it's a fight you need to have with the school. She needs to be allowed to wear something she can stand, maybe something similar but less restraining or whatever is the issue.

Most autistic people have trouble with wool and other scratchy fabrics, some need tight clothes, some need loose, we also tend to struggle with too high neckline as it makes us feel like suffocating. That may be an issue with uniform. Generally I can recommend natural, soft, stretchy fabrics. Do you remove the clothes tags? Three out of three ASD people in my family can't stand those.

I'm not sure if you know all that, if so, sorry for over-explaining, just trying to help.

Uh, ADHD or not, I think everyone deserves a partner that has their back and wants them to feel their best. I'm happy for my ADHD partner that he got the help he needs and he's happy for me having my autism diagnosis... as I think it should be. We neurodivergent people really need and deserve to have partners who accept us and are understanding enough.

Third or the white top/red skirt one. Wouldn't wear black and others are too casual.

To me it seems like he's not interested in your well-being and only wants to use you BPD as an excuse to not have to show up in a relationship and keep his distance and independence, without caring how that affects you.

Like, if he wants someone who doesn't need him, maybe he should get fish... screw that, those also need feeding, a doll perhaps? Certainly not a partner with BPD.

Guys like that would choose me too because I was so desperate to be loved that I would put up with that and do my best to not be a nuisance and always see myself as the problem, when they were just selfish -_-

When I was 18 and I broke up with my FP and he wouldn't take me back, I was so sure we were meant to be, like, twinflames spiritual shit and I would read everything about it and obsess about him, even when he got back to his GF. That didn't stop me, though, cause clearly I was the one for him, right?

So I was pretending I just want to be friends, played games with him, tried to talk him into meeting me. Hell, I once even talked him into giving me a goodbye kiss. And partly that's on him, cause he wasn't really willing to give up my attention and he would lie to us both to "keep peace" and have both of us in his life, basically. It was going on for four years!

But the craziest part was right after we broke up. I was so devastated, I couldn't continue my life as it was, so something just broke in my brain and I swinged into almost like a mania. I droped out of high school, got a tattoo of our shared star sign, became a vitarian (I was thin already but I lost weight even more), withdrew savings my family made for me, found a flat in the city where he lived and started to attend the same weekend high-school as he was. I was looking for a job and tried hard to win a lottery (I believed in this manifesting shit so badly, I was quite dellusional).

I didn't get a job, spent all my money, couldn't pay rent, I never even met him at the school... so basically after a month of this I had to beg my parents to let me stay in the city if I come back to school and they did. So I finished the school and went to college then... but I was severely depressed the whole time and for two or three years I just woke up every day and wanted to die.

Yeah, thinking of that, I'm soo healthy right now compared to that.

And yes, "high-functioning" BPD doesn't mean I was functioning better, obviously, I was just better at hiding how f-uped I was. Like, literary, noone noticed how bad it was. My mum thought I just had bad puberty and was irresponsible. Heh, sure... I knew all that spiritual stuff would look crazy, so I kept it to myself, but damn I was out of my mind.

So I broke up with my ex, couldn't stand how meaningless my life felt, so I dropped out from school, withdrew a lot of money from my savings bank account, run to another city, rented a flat, tried to find a job (no luck), tried to find a band to get into and winded up in a bar with some strangers - not important, still, since I never found that job I run out of money, had to go back to school so my parents would support me, finished it and went to college, then got married and dropped out again. You know... I usually act like a responsible person, but my life story as whole is ENFP as f... I guess :D I don't travel, though.