u/NormalTuesdayKnight

Why couldn’t it be both? Or even the other way around? They aren’t mutually exclusive 😆

Can’t believe nobody has commented on this in days! I’m also in my thirties, like nerd stuff, and live in Florida. I’d be happy to chat sometime 😁

I made a friend on here over 6 months ago, and we still talk once every two weeks or so. She has a bf she just recently started seeing, and I’m sincerely so very happy for her. It is possible to make some good connections ☺️

Fwiw, I’m also in the southeast and I’d be happy to talk sometime and see if we click 😁

I just like INFJ’s bc we compliment each other so well. Ime…:

• Disgruntled ENTP? Moody and a verbal loose cannon, but secretly wants to be soft and connect. Disgruntled INFJ? V moody and isolates, but secretly really likes being checked on and connecting.

• Happy ENTP? A little giddy and loud, also maybe still a bit of a loose cannon still if stimming a bit; dangerous in a fun chaotic sort of way, will shout and cheer and kiss a stranger but secretly wants someone to sit in those big happy feelings with them. Happy INFJ? Tippy taps ur cute little feet and mayyyybe splurges and gets yourself a small treat that you probs won’t feel bad about impulse buying later, then goes home to enjoy your favorite meal and secretly wants to share it with someone.

• ENTP when someone mistreats their friend? Say something direct then burn the place to the ground. INFJ when someone mistreats their friend? Cordially remind them of standard protocol chapter 2 subsection 4, line 15 where such behavior is prohibited, and is also unproductive…then sneakily do something passive aggressive that seems so bad, but really just inconveniences them.”

I thought I was leaning towards being ENM/poly & educated the hell out of myself. I read like a dozen blogs/articles, listened to podcasts, checked out a book or two, etc and my first poly relationship was with a girl that already had a long term relationship. We (the metas) eventually met and got along great - even toyed with the idea of a triad. More or less, the only rules we had were to tell each other if we had unprotected sex, and to not cancel plans with each other for a ONS. A couple months go by and I realize she’s canceled plans the day of like 50% of the time, despite multiple direct but kind attempts to talk about it. Eventually, I discovered she had been bailing on me, repeatedly, for flings/ONS and lying about it. Needless to say, I ended things there and haven’t looked back. I still value healthy poly; when you do it right it’s so beautiful, but at this point I have too many scars and triggers from repeated relationships ending in partners not following the rules to think that I could ever be a healthy member of a polycule again. So, I’m mono now, to answer your question.

Underrated comment

Yea, it’s still a choice. But the things you consider as options tend to change based on how you’re feeling. Especially if there’s a history of abuse, mental health disorders, neurodivergency, etc. Go read about the nervous system, my man. Especially adrenal responses and trauma informed care.

2018.

I get that the landscape has changed, but also one of my best friends got a job this year with a big name streaming service you’ve certainly heard of bc he made a web-based app as a hobbyist and did a damn good job of it. He was also involved in mixed media in school, and now walked onto a position starting at 90/yr with educational reimbursement to get some certs to “prove” he knows his stuff - which he absolutely does and can show it.

It’s absolutely possible. But you have to be the path less traveled person to get there.

Hi. It’s me. My major was in broadcasting. But I had years of experience with big box stores, then tech support in my degree field, and by the time I was applying for corporate jobs I had 3+ years of experience in tech and I could show a few tech-related hobbies. I also tend to interview well, was promoted in my longest position. Didn’t even have a degree when I was hired. It’s possible.

My dude. Bio, psych, etc need at least masters to do anything (enjoyable) in their fields most of the time. Surely you knew this.

You don’t need a CS degree, but your ass needs to get to work proving you know what you’re doing. Get a cert or two, build a home lab, or an app, showcase your skills with a portfolio. Source: I worked in tech & cybersec for 8 years. You can do this, but you need to start doing the work and using the skills now so you can show and prove yourself in a couple months.

Love that. I’ve had similar experiences with ladies on here once or twice (i think the mustache tends to attract the crazy ones). But so far none of them have walked it back; turning down a horny woman that made you uncomfortable - as a man - when she has hundreds of men climbing over each other to get into her DM’s, always seems to bring out the worst side of people. I get that it’s frustrating, but I’m allowed to have some shred of self respect, too. I can say no, just like a woman can.

Eh. First half of this response is kinda unhelpful. It shows a fundamental lack of understanding of the issues at play here.

Chances are, you’re lashing out at someone smaller/weaker than you because you feel small and weak, and in your moments when you’re overstimulated and losing your frontal lobe activity, you act out on the way you feel rather than acting out of your reasoning parts of your brain - because the parts responsible for reason aren’t turned on in those moments. You can’t just not, because in the moments when you’re lashing out you can’t think the way you’re thinking now.

Talking to a school counselor or parent are great pieces of advice. Get into counseling. Staring with talk therapy (CBT) is what most people do, but if that doesn’t prove effective then also consider looking into emotional regulation skills, life skills for talking through big feelings, and maybe even EMDR. A good therapist will be able to help you find resources for all of these.

It’s not weird when you like hamburgers but someone else likes hotdogs, it’s personal preference. And most people here are into this concept - which would mean you’re actually the weird one for being the minority. But nobody is saying that what you like is weird, because we’re respecting your difference.

And this is literally what free speech is. You’re free to put your foot in your mouth whenever you please, and I’m free to tell you that your foot is in your mouth if I want to. It’s no longer free speech if you get censored or banned for publicly sharing a different opinion. There are no measurable consequences for your words, other than other people getting to say words in response. That’s how this works. This is freedom.

Let’s try it again like an adult. You can express personal interest, or disinterest, without needing to shame other people for having different tastes than you.

Yep! But I don’t mingle; my partner is mine, and I am my partner’s. No sexual or emotional cheating for me, ty. But having fun together near friends could be great 😁

It’s wild that you’re acting like these comments are the crazy ppl when you said you switched the letters of the first and last names. That sounds like the name belongs to your friend and you told everyone how to fix it to get her real name. These people were trying to look out for you and her.

😂 I just saw those cheeks and got a little chompy 😜 i bet you’re gonna look great tho

👀

Bc ur gay now, bro. A woman touched your ass while you were inside her. That’s how u turn gay. Guess you like dick now, u big gay boy.

Grow up. Learn to be a little vulnerable with the person who’s letting you cum inside them.

🧛🏼

There’s no location in your post hun ☺️

This is part of the reason why INFJ//ENTP are considered a golden pair. The two INFJ’s I’ve known in my life have been some of my best friends and most favorite people; we are so naturally suited to being each others emotional support. We understand each other, but are also just different enough that we can fill in each others weaknesses. I love you guys 🥰

In the words of my friend, who looked back on her string of shitty exes and learned a thing or two, “I liked men who looked like they were scary and would beat the shit out of my abusers if they ever came around again. I wanted to be the one person they were soft and kind to. They weren’t.”

I think defenders makes more sense than fighters, it I can see it