u/wintersodile

I'm genuinely not trying to make you seem like a villain, but you very much seem committed to making me into one, so I'll wish you a good day as well and hope we never cross paths again.

holy fucking shit my dude

Think of it like, the more embarrassing version of siblings wearing those little matching sailor boy outfits in baby pictures.

Also, Seliph is mostly there to round out the Gen2 Trio, and he fit in with the “Julia’s family” theme so that’s really all that went into it. Julia’s just parading around her brothers and having a good time, can we please cut it out with the incest comments now, thanks.

Can't a girl force her brothers into doing something to make her smile without it coming down to incest you monster

I am moving this conversation to PMs in the interest of preventing further sub-clogging.

Funnily enough, you're the type of person I'm scared of too, because you'll never see it from the position of fear and trauma that we do. Again, what you're afraid of is defamation. What we're afraid of is death. One is infinitely worse than the other. I have never said your point isn't valid, but again, my issue is from the fact your immediate response is to assume the accusation is a lie. I hate to say this, but the justice system cannot be trusted. The justice system in this day in age is not interested in justice, and that's the sad reality victims live with. When everything is stacked against them, and people like you still continue to worry about yourselves? That, to put it lightly, sucks.

You say you hear about what women go through their whole lives. You say you know a rapist can be anywhere. And yet you still, before anything else, say "but what about men?" That's what I'm getting at. It is the conviction you have that, before victims should be protected, we should worry about the accused. That is what speaks volumes about your character and your priorities. No matter what, our word won't be enough for you either, because you're only interested in protecting yourself.

*Rapist. Raper isn't a word.

See, this is what you don't understand. To women? Anyone could be a rapist. Our friends, strangers, our own fathers. There is no man who can really be branded 100% safe because of what men do to us. It doesn't impede our daily lives, mostly, but it's a fact. You're clearly a guy. You've never had to understand this fear, and for that, you should count yourself as very lucky. I almost wish I could be as ignorant as you.

Put yourself in the position of the victim. Imagine everyone around you saying "well, we don't know". Imagine how little support you have while you're going through that intense trauma with no one there for you, because no one believes you. I will always side with them before I even consider having pity for someone accused of rape. It has happened to too many women I love to even think about entertaining that possibility. The fact that you can't get your head around what rape is and means to a victim, again, says a lot about you.

Oh no, the insults aren't backhanded, they're very intentional.

Normally, I'd be inclined to agree with you -- if the subject didn't include rape. I have to say, you're really not scoring any points by saying all this to a sexual assault victim. Two people having a nasty argument is something with two sides to a story. No one has a reason for assault or rape. There is no "compromise" with a rapist, and it is disgusting of you to even suggest as such.

Ultimately, it boils down to unless you were there in the room, no one knows what really happened. You can spout as much about consent as you want, but you weren't there. Neither was I. But who you choose to believe on principle? That says a lot about you. I'd rather believe any potential victim and be wrong than any potential rapist and be wrong. That's the difference between us.

You misunderstand what "rape culture" is. What you're describing isn't rape culture. Rape culture is societal trust towards abusers that puts victims at risk. Your definition is entirely incorrect.

What you perceive as "regret" is very often a case of "it was rape, but the victim didn't realise it until later". It happens for lots of reasons, but I assume you have no interest in empathising with victims and educating yourself when you're so concerned about yourself. What you're describing isn't an unknown phenomenon, sure, but it's certainly in the minority. The fact that you immediately latch onto that rather than the horrifying norm we live with speaks volumes about you as a person.

I'm not here to judge your friend. I don't know him. I don't care about him, his story, or his future. If you're so affronted that people are trying to protect victims from death or worse, that's on you. If all you can say to potential rape is "yes it happens but what about the men???" that's on you.

People are responsible for their own actions. It sounds to me like that's a concept you're unfamiliar with.

It's men's behaviour on a whole. It's his doing if he engaged in assault. If you'd like to argue that it's "just a perception", perhaps you'd be interested in hearing the story of my sexual assault? Maybe my little sister's? My cousin's? My best friend's? My mother's? The majority of women I know have been either physically or sexually assaulted by men who claim to be afraid of rape culture.

You're afraid of being seen as bad people. We're afraid of being raped or killed. You tell me which is worse.

If you're so scared of being a bad person, do better. That's all there is to it. It's not anyone else's problem but men's to fix their shitty behaviour.